Combatting Loneliness This Christmas
Loneliness is something that can affect anyone at any time in their lives, but the holiday period can really bring that feeling to the forefront. In 2023, Nextdoor and Marmalade conducted a survey which found that 85% of adults in the UK have experienced loneliness in the past 12 months, highlighting how loneliness is more common than we might think. Expectations that Christmas is a time of joy and happiness can add more pressure and make us feel like we’re missing out or that other people have it better, adding to those feelings of loneliness and isolation.
If you’re spending Christmas alone or away from loved ones, or if you’re spending time with people and feel lonely nonetheless, there are ways to keep these feelings at bay.
The first step is to acknowledge those feelings and be kind to yourself. Feeling lonely is completely normal, and lots of people feel this way at times, so remember you are not alone in how you feel and others will understand, if you choose to open up to them. Accepting these feelings will help make them feel less intense, and help you to focus on other more positive things.
Another step you can take is to reach out to others who you would like to speak to. It might be a friend, a family member, a neighbour who you have a friendly chat with, someone you live with, or someone else in your life. You could have a phone call or a video call together, or organise a meet up in person to go for a walk or a coffee. This will give you something to look forward to and help to remind you that you have people in your life who are there for you. Being honest about how you’re feeling can seem overwhelming, but if you can tell them how you’re feeling they can be there for you and support you with understanding and kindness.
If you’d rather chat to someone confidentially over the holidays, there are organisations who are always at the end of the phone who will talk and listen to you. You can find links and contact details for these organisations at the end of the article.
You could also need some space from people at Christmas, as loneliness doesn’t always mean you’re alone, just that these feelings increase when around certain people at certain times. If you need a break from being at home or with others, why not go for a lovely Christmas walk in your area? Or take some time away from others by reading or napping to recharge your social battery and give yourself some peace.
If you want to be around new people, you could also consider volunteering over Christmas. You can find a local volunteering opportunity via Crisis or The Big Issue (links at the end of the article), or through a quick Google Search for ‘Christmas volunteering near me’ and help out in your community. You will meet lots of new people who are all coming together to make this Christmas a special time for others. Helping people has proved to have a positive impact on mental health, and may lead to new friendships or more volunteering opportunities in the future.
If it’s Christmas itself and the idea of celebrating that triggers feelings of loneliness or isolation, then it’s good to acknowledge that you don’t have to celebrate it if you don’t want to. You can make your own traditions, not letting pressure from anyone tell you how or why you should celebrate, and make it a day filled with things that bring you happiness. It could be as simple as choosing an activity you enjoy to fill your day with, or buying delicious foods that bring you joy, or reaching out and asking a friend or loved one if they want to do something special with you this year. Whatever you would like to do you can do that rather than following any Christmas traditions or expectations.
Loneliness and isolation are hard things to experience, but try to remember they won’t last forever and Christmas will pass. If you can, try and reach out to someone or do something nice for yourself, as you deserve to feel supported and treated with kindness.
Volunteering
https://www.bigissue.com/news/housing/volunteering-on-christmas-day-how-you-can-get-involved/
https://www.crisis.org.uk/get-involved/volunteer/volunteer-at-christmas/
Useful Contact Details
Samaritans: https://www.samaritans.org/ or call 116 123
AgeUK: ageuk.org.uk or call 0800 678 1602
Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM): thecalmzone.net or call 0800 58 58 58 (open from 5pm- midnight)
National Domestic Abuse Helpline: nationaldahelpline.org.uk or call 0808 2000 247
Shout: giveusashout.org or text SHOUT to 85258 (text advice service)
The Silver Line: thesilverline.org.uk or call 0800 470 80 90 (for people aged 55+)
Switchboard: switchboard.lgbt or call 0800 0119 100 (open 10am-10pm)